Listen. Flat hunting in London for a place to rent is one of the most painful things you’ll ever do. Unless you are purchasing somewhere in London. I hardly ever link up other articles here, but I will today because
this buzzfeed article on flat hunting in London is spot on.
Today I’d like to talk about the various type of estate agents you will meet. If I have any estate agent followers I am sure you are lovely people and the exceptions to most of these sterotypes. But most agents we met this week? Avoid them like plague. They will torture you. And the sick thing is that you are paying them to!
(What you will think with his every breath.)
Coming out with bullshit and chat is like breathing air to the Big Daddy. He’ll be the head estate agent at his agency. Or just head of lettings. He’ll probably be rocking a lot of man bling.
Smooth Talker
(Or at least that’s what you’ll want to say to the Smooth Talker. But you also want somewhere to live so you don’t.)
He will say a lot of things like “be flexible” and “this isn’t where or what you wanted but….” He’ll convince you he is getting you a deal. Beware of this one as a) he will never get you a deal and you’ll end up paying more and b) he’ll probably stop caring about your flat hunt altogether if a client with more money walks into his office.
The Put-Upon Jr
(He doesn’t care. He just wants to go to bed.)
He’d probably be a good agent in his own right. But he’s working his way up the ladder so he does everything that no one else wants to do. He’ll have probably already been in the office for 12 hours before you walk in the door and will have memory problems. He’ll need to be reminded multiple times about what, where or how much you want to pay but you’ll probably forgive him that.
Children
(Nene, please speak for me.)
I’m sorry, are you spending your gap year as a junior estate agent? Oh you are? Okay, that’s fine. Can you answer a single question about the property? No. Well then go to school and let the grownups deal with flats.
Bullshit Artists
(Thought by me every single time an estate agent opened their mouths.)
The BA agents are easily confused with the Smooth Talkers, but the BA will straight-up lie to your face. Things like this will happen: BA- “We have nothing in your price range. You’ll have to go up.” You- “But your colleague said you can show me property X. Is that not available any longer?” Then the BA will begrudgingly show you property in your price range but will undoubtedly lie about something else.
Reasonable Ones
(And tumbleweeds blow through my life as we are yet to encounter this one yet.)
And then there’s the diamond in the rough. An estate agent who is helpful, good at their job, knows the area and works quickly and efficiently.
